Truck has been stolen from driveway and plans for swimming and shopping temporarily stalled. Personal observational skills in need of honing, as driveway is mere twenty feet from bedroom window, and theft occurred in broad daylight. Police do not arrive to take report for three hours. I provide them with details about stolen contents such as GPS unit, but am not convinced motivation for Grand Theft was my CDs, which include Doris Day and Matt Monro.
Don goes in search himself, and finds vehicle two blocks away in apartment parking lot. He uses extra key and drives it home. I inform police so they may call off their search. They become agitated when they hear that Don has Taken Law into his Own Hands. Dispatcher tells me, in tones of rebuke, that He could have been pulled from vehicle and Arrested had a police officer seen him.
Consider replying that thieves would be quite fortunate to have police On Hand to see us take our own vehicle, while preserving prolonged absence when it was stolen from driveway. (Query: Is improvement being made in Character when I fail to make sarcastic comment, or is this merely pragmatic decision that Discretion is the Better Part of Valor? Answer as to whether Character is Improving remains murky.)
Contents of boxes in truck, which had old clothing and were slated for donation to thrift store, distributed everywhere as if tossed by the Mob. Am ready to look for perpetrators and exact frontier justice, after they have been tied in trunk and driven Through the Night to a frontier, but Don dissuades me from any action.
(Mem: Check all passersby on street carefully, to see if they are wearing my old clothes.)
Crime Spree comes to end without bloodshed, and expect rest of week to be uneventful. However, when at home alone, I hear footsteps on roof of house. Footsteps far too heavy and measured to be that of an animal, so occurrence joins other family stories of ghostly visitations. As ghost appears harmless, my only condition for our corporeal hospitality is that he should reveal numbers for the Lottery. Would be happy to Put in a Good Word for him in effort to earn him his wings, should we win Big Money.
(Query: Does the Afterlife confer psychic benefits, or are the deceased cheating and asking a beneficent Deity for the numbers ?)