Canine depression exhibited by dear Sugar ruffles Sunday’s domestic harmony. Tendency to hide under pillows and burrow under low furniture most unlike her. Small furry bottom remains in view with tail waving like question mark. Mr. Squeak in need of reassurance due to lack of interest by Sugar.
Behavior mystifies us for better part of day. Inspiration strikes and we remove metal vaccination tag from collar. Change is remarkable and immediate as Sugar jumps up and down with her usual energy. Fashion conscious dogs with strict guidelines to achieving canine sartorial bliss difficult to understand.
Further ruffling of tranquility perpetrated by telemarketers with distinctive Indian accents. Telemarketers have me in cross-hairs, phoning almost every hour, and show no fear of Chicago PD or Homeland Security, but instead counter threats with inappropriate suggestions as to how I may want to spend some time with them. Plotting revenge while waiting for next call absorbs some time, but all is worth it when I blow very shrill and loud whistle into phone as soon as call is connected. Fear whistle caused me greater amount of hearing loss than intended target, but as I am recipient of no other calls, it is clear Perfect Solution has presented itself.
Perfect Solution also encompasses not being able to hear telemarketers’ pitches due to deafness. Temporary hearing loss was also the case when whistle was used to call unruly seventh-graders to order while teaching. (Not being able to hear sales pitches or middle-school chaos can be pleasant alternatives.)
Continue to pursue project of softening denim jacket. Soaking jacket in vinegar and salt is recommended, and jacket now smells like salad. Along with coconut oil rubbed in skin and cucumber perfume sample rubbed on Sugar’s head, vegetarians follow us while out walking. Carnivores not so enthusiastic.
Desert winter weather makes walking a joy until discovery of big blisters on both heels. Feet resemble product of meat packing plant. Walking with better shoes will have to wait for at least a week. Remember words of dear Brandon, oft repeated after similar incidents of woe, that Nothing Good ever came from Exercise or Broccoli.
Dear Sugar an apt and willing pupil during walk, and learns to Heel (perhaps blistered, bleeding feet were motivation?) after rocky start during which she tries to see both sides of trail at the same time, wrapping leash around my ankles as if playing Cowboys and Indians. Park visitors no doubt entertained by flailing arms and rude remarks about the murky legalities of her parent’s relationship. Canine excitement finally dissipates and she ceases to feign assault on every walker and biker on trail. Am pleased and proud of her rapid progress, and look for someone to Brag To.
Stop at store on the way home, and wonder whether Sugar and I walked further than we thought and have stumbled into Future. Young clerk sees my library card on key ring and asks if Library is Still Open, as she was sure technology had replaced it By Now. I check the date, see it is Still Today, think of the many branches of the Clark County Library, decide they could not possibly have closed during my hour-long walk, and tell her politely that ‘Yes, Library is Still Open as far as I know.’
(If I am mistaken, I have become owner of many new books.)
Ponder the many times I have asked a Young Thing to help me with technology, and am now helping a Young Thing understand how technology has Not Yet replaced libraries.
(Circle of Life has again made an appearance in everyday Life to the enlightenment of All Concerned.)